I haven’t posted in a while and now I’m back with a touch of a rant.
I naively posted a while back about how evolved we are in our little slice of suburbia in that so little bullying goes on in the schools. I didn’t intend to tempt the universe to prove me wrong, but I’ve heard a few things lately that show me that my earlier comments were inaccurate. I couldn’t be more sorry about that – not because I was wrong, but because of the situations that have come to my attention.
I’m not going to go into what I’ve heard in any specifics – that’s for the school officials to deal with. I will say that some of this stuff is very serious – extremely cruel behaviors by kids who are styled as leaders in the high school setting – the sort of thing that makes headlines when the victim takes desperate measures to make it stop.
There’s also the insidious, more mild, but still appalling garden variety crap that goes on. Snotty teenagers forming (and even naming) exclusive cliques, ensuring that all those who aren’t included know exactly what they’re missing, while the individual members are in a clear pecking order, and talk about each other being their backs. Insecure middle schoolers who try to manipulate social situations, again through selective inclusion and public exclusion.
Here’s the thing. The kids should know better, for sure. They’ve had guidance classes every year since they were 4 talking about feelings and bullying and being kind. In middle school they are required to take a Leadership class in which this sort of thing is confronted. There are news stories about bullied kids committing suicide in their despair.
But kids are immature and often just flat stupid in spite of what they have been taught. My real question is, WHERE ARE THE PARENTS? I know these people, some personally, and some at least in a general sense. They are educated. They are affluent. They talk a huge game about their superior parenting skills. And yet they have failed. But they can’t see it! They seem to have no idea what is going on – posting all happily on Facebook about their wonderful children and cozy lives while their kid is out there doing real damage to people.
I’ve had it. And no, I’m not referring to anything specific that has happened to my own kids. They see the stuff, sure. And they are certainly affected at least somewhat by the snotty clique stuff, just because it happens right in front of them. I just needed to get this out here on the off-off chance that someone who needs to read it will do so, and then step up and do their job as a parent before someone gets seriously hurt.
Oh, and happy Monday, everyone.